A test,

No cheating....

Read this sentence below:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS.

Now count aloud the F's in that sentence.

Count them ONLY ONCE !!!

DO NOT GO BACK AND COUNT THEM AGAIN.

See below...

Answer below:

ANSWER:

There are six F's in the sentence. One of average intelligence finds three of them. If you spotted four, you're above average. If you got five, you can turn your nose at most anybody. If you caught six, you are a genius. There is no catch. Many people forget the "OF"'s. The human brain tends to see them as V's and not F's. Pretty weird, huh?

End of test.

WHAT IF LAMAN HAD A DIARY?

CHAPTER ONE

Dear Diary,
I, Lemuel, being born of filthy rich but nagging parents, therefore, =
I
have been harassed much of my life; not only by my parents, but by my
younger brother Nephi, and my older brother Laman, with whom I get along
the best. There! Now maybe my parents will get off my back about =20
keeping a record. -- Lem

CHAPTER TWO

Dear Diary,
Well, It's finally happened! My father is a lunatic! He has decided
that he feels that we should leave the big city and head out into the
wilderness. He hasn't said where. He started talking about leaving
after he came home from yelling at people to repent. He said the people
threw rocks at him. No kidding! I think one of them must have beaned
him on the noggin. When he came home, he went to his tent and laid
on his bed for about 12 hours straight. I thought he was in a coma. *
Lem

CHAPTER THREE

Dear Diary,
Hi, I'm Lemuel, and I'm dumb.
Dear Diary,
I didn't write that last entry. Laman must have gotten hold of the
plates. Sometimes he's a real jerk. I wish there was a way to erase
engravings. Maybe a jeweler could fix it. Life stinks right now! Dad
said we had to leave everything we owned because he had a dream about
it! Yech! Dad also says (because of another dream---imagine that!) =
we
have to go back to town and get some brass plates from Uncle Laban. Sure,
like Laban's going to say, "Here, have them. Maybe you want my coat,
too? You want me to die from pneumonia or something?" Laban hit me once
when we were younger because I spit on him. I'm not going! *Lem

CHAPTER FOUR

Dear Diary,
I decided to go to the city after all. We just got back and the hike
was murder. Laman was picked to talk to Laban. He went over and talked
to him. Then, he got drunk and asked one of Laban's girlfriend's out on
a date. Laban got mad and beat Laman up pretty good. After that, we
went to our old home and got our gold and tried to buy the plates from
Laban. His gang chased us away and stole our stuff. Laman was furious!

I thought the vein on his forehead would blow up! He and I got sticks
and beat up Nephi and Sam until we got tired. Then an angel came and
told us to quit hitting them. Boy, Nephi and Sam sure got lucky! Nephi
went back to the city and found Laban laying in the street. He was so
drunk that Nephi chopped off his head and got the plates. What a trip!
* Lem

CHAPTER FIVE

Dear Diary,
Now Dad wants us to go back to the city and get Ishmael and his Family.
He probably wants us to go marry his daughters.....he's got a million
kids. I guess I don't mind so much about going back to the city this
time; at least we get some babes out of it! Some of Ishs' daughters are
pretty good looking even though they don't have much upstairs. Sounds
like a pretty good match for me, eh? I'll write more when we get back.
Just got back from the city. Ishmael's daughters are better looking=20
than I remembered. But, there's one that's really ugly. She's hangin'
on Laman like a bad suit. Nephi is a real pain in the camel's hump!=20
He's been on our backs the whole time. He keeps telling me to repent.=20
Sheesh! It's not like I'm CAIN or something! *Lem

CHAPTER SIX
Dear Diary,
I've had it out here! I'm not a happy camper! I've had diarrhea for
the last two months. There been nothin' to eat recently but dried
scorpion tails. I haven't been writing much lately because things have
been really hard! Now Dad has this gold--colored ball that he sits and
stares at for hours every day. He says it tells him what to do and where
to go. If Dad's looking for that kind of information, I can give him a
few ideas. Ahh, I'm going to bed! Mom's pregnant, I think, either that
or she's got a tumor. I think she's too old to have a baby. * Lem

CHAPTER SEVEN

Dear Diary,
Mom was pregnant! She had a boy, named him Jake. We all have families
now and most of us have at least one kid. I have two; Frank and Jesse.
They're little terrors. but I guess they'll grow out of it. I know I
should write more, but I keep putting it off. I don't know the reason
but my wife is getting really buff. I'm worried because she's almost
gotten bigger than me. I think it's because of all the very rare steak
she's
been eating! In fact, nothing is cooked! Dad has really fallen off his
rocker this time! Laman's wife is huge! She's stronger than eight cows,
But then, I told Laman he'd have an eight cow wife. --Lem

CHAPTER EIGHT

Dear Diary,
Oh Man!! Could that be a deli out in the middle of the wilderness?
I'm craving some bagels and lox. Maybe some pastrami on rye. Ahh, =
it's
just a mirage. Nephi says Heavenly Father told him to build a boat.=20
Nephi's never seen a boat. Jerusalem is landlocked! I've never seen
more than a glass of water at a time, let alone a whole ocean. And now
Nephi thinks he's Noah all of a sudden. You know, Nephi really
chaps my hide! Why, he can't even shoot a bow. Nephi broke his last
week. We went a day without food because of it. Knowing Nephi, he
probably called it a fast. Gotta bolt! * Lem

CHAPTER NINE

Dear Diary,
Laman gave me a tattoo. It really hurts. He rubbed salt in it before
I could stop him. He said salt makes it feel better. It hurts like the
dickens. Why did I let him do it? He can talk me into just about
anything. I can't believe it's been eight years since we left home, and
here we are on a beach with a ship that probably won't even float.=20
Knowin' Nephi's building ability, the boat will probably spring a leak!
Hey that reminds me............I'm back now. Mom had another baby,
called him Joe. I can already tell he's going to be trouble. -- Lem

CHAPTER TEN

Dear Diary,
I'm really seasick! We've been having a party here on the ship that
Nephi made. The boat worked pretty good. We've been floating around for
about two weeks now. We tied up Nephi yesterday because he's such a
stiff. He got really mad at Laman and me because we got drunk. It's
stormy a lot. If it gets much worse we might sink. Everybody says that
Heavenly Father is punishing us with this storm and that we
should untie Nephi. Yeah, right! I doubt it. But Maybe we'll untie him
after Family Home Evening. * Lem

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Dear Diary,
We've finally landed. I feel like we've been on this tub forever!=20
Good thing Nephi brought all those seeds. There's nothing to eat and
it's my turn to go hunting. What if I run into some big animal I've
never seen before. Maybe I can con Jake or Joe into going hunting for
me. Can you believe it? Nephi is already talking about building a
temple. And we haven't even been here for a day! Can't he give this
religion thing a rest? Laman has already got ideas about moving out on
his own. I think I'll go with him. * Lem

CHAPTER TWELVE

Dear Diary,
Well, Nephi finally did it. He finally got Laman so mad at him that
Laman couldn't see straight. They started talking again about who was
going to be the leader. Laman thinks he should be the leader, because
he's the oldest. But, Nephi thinks he should be the leader because some
angels said so. Oh well, it'll be the last fight between them for
awhile. Nephi and a bunch of the family left a few nights ago to live
somewhere else. And they took everything with them. The brass plates,
Laban's sword, the gold-colored ball, everything! Laman's pretty ticked
off. I'm glad I stayed with him. Nephi won't know the first thing about
living in the wilderness on his own. But since Nephi left, we've all
developed a red rash on our skin. We can't seem to get rid of it. *

Please submit your ideas.