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Adopt Me

Imagine that every other day you go to the local basketball court to play basketball and while there you develop a fun sporting relationship with some of the men, women and boys. One handsome young man in particular aged 10 comes regularly and sees you almost like a father figure. He observes the way you play, asks you for tips and during breaks you have friendly chat - he is a nice boy you discover. After about three months you start to inquire more after the boy noticing that he always comes on his own and his clothes are not in the best of repair. He explains that his parents died about five months ago from a tragic house fire and although he has a grandmother to stay with she is very elderly and can hardly walk and he uses the basketball court as a way to not think about them. He also shares with you his feelings about the support that you unknowingly provided for him while there. You are silenced for awhile and then the boy adds in a very cute but nervous way... "You know you can always adopt me if you want... ummm, I mean if you want to?" Question is this... what would be your response?

Me Adopt

It depends on the child, in my own circumnstances and the relationship we both have with each other.

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Adoption is a life changing decision, and I would be very hesitant to do so. I would talk to the kid and explain that adoption may be a bit much, but I would be more than happy to be a big brother or mentor. I would even visit the family and help out when I can. Hopefully he can understand and it wont spoil the relationship we have.

Me Adopt

Coming from someone who was adopted (but would have LOVED to have been adopted by someone else at the time), I can picture the innocence and pleading in his eyes, hear the doubt and fear in his voice, afraid of what I would say, and feel the aching and longing to be loved and wanted. I do not know every child who wants to be adopted, but I know a lot of research to back up the claims that a child who wants to be adopted most likely has these desperate feelings. I also know from the many, many adoptees that I have spoken with at conferences for adopted children and such, as well as from my own experiences. So, if I was unable to adopt him, then I would definitely gently suggest an alternative, just as Malexander said. I would be as caring and loving as I could possibly be while I was explaining that I couldn't adopt him, but that I loved him and wanted him to be a part of my life. I also would hope that the child could accept this.

Me Adopt

I agree with Malexander. Adoption is a really big deal, and unless the situation is really desperate and the child's liife without an adaptor will be not too good, (and I am in an appropriate age to adopt someone), I will not do it.