JB, yes, it's not great, and I know that you fully understand the situation yourself.
It's now getting to the stage that I don't want to go out and do anything other than walking with her in case we have other meltdowns. Obviously it's not that easy though, so in future I will have to pre-empt things that are going to be triggers in advance, or we are all going to end up stuck in the house.
Bruconero, we are in the Uk, where a few years ago laws regarding smacking was introduced.. You are allowed to give a smack... But can be prosecuted if you leave even a slight mark!
Because of these laws, it is rare to see anybody in public smack their children, and others looking out for it to report as it is frowned upon .
I just find that instead of the British public (And I'm sure the same goes in many other countries) trying to understand.. They quickly jump in and judge without fully understanding the situation.
As it goes for the police.. I'm not quite sure what they expect to hear, they are certainly not going to find that my daughter is 'cured' just because she's been told off by them, sadly it's never going to be that way.
Incidentally, it's not our parentng skills either, it's just how people with Autism can be sometimes.
What a terrible situation! JB, is there any way in which the situation could improve? I don't mean a solution, since I'm aware that's not possible yet, but maybe some small progress. Is there any chance that growing up and acquiring maturity and experience, other than self-awareness, they might gain the ability of smoothing down, if not controlling, some of these reactions?
DianeC, I understand the reasoning behind that law and I can't say that's a bad thing. When I said it could become necessary, I was talking about a good spank on the bum not smacking the face which is crazy. Many people, sadly, use violence as a tool for parenting which is not only primitive but also condemnable in all ways. With my intervention I didn't mean to defend or justify those who abuse their children, just throw there my opinion.
Also in my Country, of course, you can't scold your child in public or else everybody will jump on you since, as you said, judging without having the slightest understanding of what's really going on is a national sport in every Country.
I have a child with autism. He is 12 and 6'2". He's incredibly brilliant and his autism is in the form of Aspergers. We are extraordinarily fortunate that he is high functioning. However, he does have his limitations- As we all do.
In our home we view autism and treat autism as a different culture. Because really that's what it is. Individuals with autism as you know are wired differently than those people who are neurotypical
Our son has sensory disorders that we are mindful of.
His life revolves around tokens. He has a set amount of tokens every day that he begins with. Every interaction he has, everything he does, takes up energy or takes away tokens. When his tokens are gone his executive function crashes. That's when problems happen.
So we are cognizant and mindful of what he can and can't do. She's also learning that he has to be a will to function in a society of people who are not autistic.
The statistics in the United States regarding autism are scary- Over half of the individuals diagnosed with autism or even Aspergers cannot hold a job, or live independently. Where working very hard with our son to help him learn the skills he will need to live successfully in this world.
We realize that there are others whose children are affected more intensely than our child.
What upsets me greatly is when I hear people say what's wrong with him.
There's nothing wrong with him it's just that his brain is wired differently than other people's .
What we have found is that our son in the beginning was like a bullet train on a dirt road. Once we got him on the right track he smoked us all.
Does this mean that every day is really easy - no. But I'm really wouldn't want my child any other way it's who he is. And I feel that God gave me this special child for a reason.
I'm reading over the experiences here and I'm amazed. My amazement is about your ability to keep on doing it, at some point I think I would have cracked open like an egg from having to constantly cater for all the special needs. I know what a tantrum is like and it can be overwhelming even if its just once in a blue moon so to have to deal with that every day its just mind boggling. How do you all cope?