Worship of Cherubim
To the Cherubim,
I had an encounter with someone who slowed down time. I went to the physician and ignorantly, fell asleep until the procedure was over, and I feel I could have been more prudent with my time. Forgive me for this. I've met some mysterious dwarf and ended up with some extra gold, from which I do not know how it came into my pocket. If I have taken from some poor soul unwittingly, may I repay the debt over time. What is given to me one day is taken from me another. The stewards of this city who tax us, though the citizens are suspicious of them, need guidance, maybe even more than the ordinary citizen, given their unique position. I only ask that we all be better stewards of the blessings given to us.
Life has in other ways been quite ordinary, and I have not been terribly mistreated any more than I would have during my youth. Things even seem better. Will it continue like this, or are there difficult trials in store for me? Be gentle with me, and build my strength for the times to come. I enjoy growing stronger and improving myself in all areas. May I be given the opportunity to continually learn, so that I may help others as you have so helped me.
I do not know how you came to be. Would it be possible to become closer to you? That you would show me love, though I do not particularly deserve it more than anyone else. All things considered, I'm alive and well off. I cannot complain. Yet don't all creatures desire more care, more hope, and seek out that great majesty through worship? Please, let me know you more. How is it that you appear as different animals, and how do you choose such a thing? Perhaps I will die in ignorance over these things. What's it matter? All is grace. Watch over me still.
Peace,
Vivian.
My Plans for the Exchequer
"Picture this Charles. A large open first floor to entertain your guests, supported by sturdy pillars throughout. Stained glass all throughout the windows for plenty of light, and buttresses to hold up the high walls that will give you plenty of interior spaces above for more specialized purposes. An esplanade towards the sunrise so you can have a morning walk before your meal time, before heading into work refreshed and well. I sought to create something that didn't clash too much with the surrounding homes, but still wanted to combine some baroque and gothic elements together to make something unique."
Vivian was very happy to finally bring her architectural talents into the fray. It may not have been for her home, and it may not have been for the poor, but while her neighbors might still view her with suspicion, she hoped that she'd become known as someone with an eye for aesthetics.
Why Am I Vivian?
Why am I good? How I wish I could be like that child who asked me that question. I suppose I could have plenty of excuses to be cruel and mean, debasing myself to my uglier desires. I could also give all the credit to my mother, to the elders who bothered to treat me fairly, the education I had, and any other such things outside my control. But I do not know why I have chosen to desire the virtuous things at the expense of my impulsive and primal instincts. Is it because I am a naive dreamer who wishes--even believes--that everyone could live a just life and exercise self-control in all things?
I don't think one can worry too much over such things. It is normal to want to be good in a way that is greater than my own capacity for goodness, just as for those who love evil, they wish to make themselves mighty and powerful and become known as more horrifying and wretched than any evil thus seen among the nations. I can understand such an inclination, even if there is something strange that repulses me from such an attitude. I've thought it before, but I say it again for you, the reader. Most evil is boring and ordinary. That's the most insidious kind of evil. But the grand evils of the wicked who plot, this is what drives masses into hysteria and despair.
In believing a goddess who loves me and will use me for judgement of evil, I can only hope that I would prove worthy. Do I need any other justification to do good?