
Is 3 weeks too soon?
My friend told me today that she is engaged!
I was kind of like "um... ok... you are joking right?!"
But no...she was being 100% serious. I just wanted to get different peoples views on this. She is 17, he is 21... and they have been dating for 3 weeks... and last week they broke up for 2 days because he cheated on her...
I kind of think their relationship is..okay... but in my opinion 3 weeks isn't much time to get to know each other very well and get engaged. I have been with my boy friend now for a few years, and we haven't got engaged. When I had been going out with my partner for 3 weeks I didn't even love him... It was just lust! But everyone is different and I didn't want to say anything to her except congrats! But... I don't think it's a good idea really. She was heartbroken when he cheated on her... once a cheater, always a cheater...but I don't know...
Comments...?
LOL...everytime I read something like that from you Xtra, I wonder where do you meet this kind of people? lol I'm not trying to be mean, but it's just so difficult to understand how they think and act. It's so immature, and it's not a matter of age but a matter of life experiences, family, and self-esteem.
You asked if 6 weeks is too soon but it's NOT a matter of time but a matter of the environment of the whole thing. He cheated on her and now he wants to marry her? He's just playing around because maybe she didn't want to forgive him for what he did and then the nice idea of the 'ring' came to his mind. She must be really silly (and I'm being nice) to believe that he's serious. She really don't have self-esteem at all!. He's older than her which it will tell me that he had experienced things she didn't yet and he's taking full advantage of that. But that's NOT his fault because he's a cheater and as you well mentioned he will always be...but it's HER fault for allowing him to do the things he's doing and doing nothing about it.
Now, you said you didn't tell her anything expect congrats...if she's really your friend you should share your concerns and care for her because if she really marries the guy and the whole thing doesn't work you will feel terrible thinking you could talk to her and tell her about it...
A true friend tell the truth, share the love and concern for the other friend. A true friend don't smile when she doesn't feel to or congratule if she doesn't feel comfortable. But because she cares about her friend she does the things to help her out.
The whole idea is totally crazy Xtra, even more when the guy is a cheater...somebody needs to stop her before is too late.
QUOTE |
You asked if 6 weeks is too soon but it's NOT a matter of time but a matter of the environment of the whole thing. . |
veryloudsygirl, I agree with you in this one. But like I said in my earlier post I don't think it's a matter of time but a matter of maturity and the circumnstances of this engagement. He cheated on her and now they're getting married? *shaking head*
Me personally, I would require more than three weeks, but I believe it would be possible to know by then. If you find a soulmate then I suppose you just know you want to spend the rest of your life with them. With the whole cheating thing, that's another story. I believe that if they cheated once, there is not enough self control not to do it agian. It could turn into a vicious cycle. I would never cheat on anyone, especially if I was thinking of marrying them! I would take that as a warning sign that this may not work.
3 weeks? Thats ridiculous...I think at least a year is appropriate or even longer. My parents knew eachother for 8 months before they got engaged and got married shortly after that...and if he cheated on her. Why is she marrying him? Crazy world we live in.