Poljen actually reddens as Velon explains his previous speech, but then he asks why it is important to the big man, and the color in Poljen's cheeks deepens, and spreads to his ears and neck.
"Aye, it is true I have delivered death blows to dragons, but all three were group efforts. I was merely lucky to be the one to have the final blow. And while I know I am skilled in arms, I also am well aware of how lucky, perhaps even blessed in battle. And to be known for such things is indeed, uh, gra-tea-fy-ing. But part of me wants to be recognized as more than a strong arm and a stout warrior." He pauses, then looks up. "I know I say I hope my enemies think me slow-witted, but I guess I am worried that even my friends think that. I would also like to be recognized as a cunning fighter, by you and the rest of the Silver Blaze." Now that he has verbalized his fear, he can tell how petty a concern it is. But it is obviously important to him anyway.
Velon scratches his head a little. "Ah, well, I wasn't really talking about death blows, but yeah. I meant you are the only one of us who was there for all three at all, because I missed the first, Lia the second, and Cratol the third. You are our rock, as you've been here from the start and are the only one who has been here the whole time. I have faith that you will always be there for us."
Velon sighs a little. "I don't know what to tell you about tactics and being cunning. I don't think I'm any smarter than you are. That's why I try, I think, to listen to the whole group for ideas. If I had to come up with every idea we'd surely all be dead by now! I think we usually go with the majority, don't we? I occasionally I have to make a tough choice, I suppose. I don't recall the whole group wanting to do one thing and me overruling everyone because 'I am the leader.' Do you truly feel that I listen to any one of Cratol or Taz or Lawrance or Morgaine or Mari or Perry over you?"
Velon sighs again. "I guess my best advice is to keep trying and give your input, and I will try to listen to everyone." He grows a bit more stern and adds "As it is my job to keep everyone safe, to some regard, I will not simply tell you what you want to hear, however." "I will not promise to try to influence the group to go along with all of your ideas just for the sake of your ego, or so that we don't have to keep having this conversation even. You would not want me to just do whatever another member of the group wants every time for fear of how sensitive they are either, I'd imagine!" He stands firm on this, at the risk of angering the barbarian.
Still being firm, Velon continues. "I will tell you honestly what I think and we will see if you can truly handle the conversation you say you wish to have here. You have had many good ideas and I would be quite confident in you leading the group into battle if I am unable to. I am not sure I would say that of anyone else but Lia, so that alone should say something about how we value your thinking, your tactics, your cunning in battle. Do you think we'd let the bard lead? We'd take a four day detour to buy appropriate fashion for the occasion and then he'd reveal he had no plan beyond that! Do you think we'd let the wizard lead? The plan would surely involve us all suffocating or dying of old age inside a magical hut full of an excessive number of spectral steeds!" He pauses for a moment, shakes his head, and mutters "Wizards… "
"I will challenge you though, to be even better than you have already been and thus we will likely follow your lead even more often, to everyone's benefit. Such a challenge is the burden of all leaders, since you are one of ours, and is not something I will push Mari or Poppo for. Every day I think of all of the things I could have done better, and it is a vast number. It is simply our burden, and is a challenge the three of us must live up to if we are to see this war through to the end. Thus consider if you would ever retreat if it was best to keep everyone alive, or would you think we can win no matter what the odds? Would you ever forgo your glory of a death blow or other such things to try other tactics like wrestling a creature down so it cannot flee or silencing a powerful spell weaver with the stone? Chuth probably would have fled earlier and gotten away if Mari had simply pounded on her like, well, an ape, but did not wrestle her down, for instance! Again, since the subject seems to bother you so, you thought you and the others could go in and get the mask AND YOU DID, yet then you were upset that we did not stay and fight? WHY DID YOU BOTHER TO SNEAK IN THEN? Why did we bring the whole cavern of trolls and golems and kobolds and a dragon and wizard all upon us at once? For a more challenging fight? You contradict your own plan, I'm guessing, because you take pride in being able to pull off the stealthy part but then in turn have too much pride not to also pick a fight!" Velon is pretty animated now, and not in the lighthearted way he was earlier in the conversation. He's starting to get mad just thinking of all of this, being far from a perfect leader himself, but then does begin to calm down a little.
"Poljen, I KNOW you are better than that. I have seen you use good tactics in a number of battles. The skills are there, the mind for it is there, and I know that just as well as you do. Lia knows it too. You just need to get rid of the times that your pride controls the tactics you suggest, as I would even follow you as leader if you would do that!" Velon seems genuinely frustrated by the subject but also very sincere in his words about knowing Poljen has the skills and Velon's willingness to follow his lead if he would put his pride aside in favor of his mind. He crashes back down into the chair and looks exhausted, peering at the floor, and speaks more softly now. "We are far too alike, you and I. You have better ideas than I do much of the time. The only difference is the pride, as I am no one from nowhere who has inherited a bit of magic through sheer luck and wears magic armor that is far more powerful than the man who wears it. You have more reason for the pride, to be sure, as you have probably always been strong and you could fight in the nude and perhaps still be the most powerful warrior in the realm. It is easier for me to think only of the group as I myself am nothing special at all… "At this he trails off, staring at the floor, and is silent.
Edited: Cinder on 31st Aug, 2018 - 4:28pm
Poljen listens to Velon speak. He does reply briefly once or twice. "No, you have not listened to anyone in particular over me, save possibly for Lia. And I would only want you to follow my idea if you feel it is good. So I will try to offer better ideas."
But when Velon chastises him about their recent mission, his demeanor changes slightly. "You have it wrong, Velon. I went along with the plan to infiltrate to get the mask because everyone thought it worth a try. I am NOT stealthy by nature, but as I am light on my feet, for someone my size, plus these fine boots, made me think I could offer protection for our true scouts if they needed it. Which they did. And if we had managed to secure the mask without alerting the dragon and the prince, I would have gladly left without causing trouble. But that was not to be. The mask had some magic that let them know our scouts were getting it. I did not start that fight. I first did my best to cover Zarra and Mari's escape. Getting the mask out was indeed my priority. I managed to keep the prince occupied for quite a while, and even managed to force him to burn off much of his magic. And once Lia had that magic box-thing preventing them from getting the mask back, I saw an opportunity to end the dragon and prince. We could have sent Zarra off with the mask, and the rest of us could kill the dragon." He sighs. "One of your challenges was for me to be willing to retreat to keep everyone alive. I do not think that should be our objective. Yes, we do not want to lose members needlessly. If we had stayed and fought Chuth, I am confident we would have won that fight. Both she and the prince had used much magic by the point the mask would have been safely away. But it is true we might have lost a member of the Blaze, maybe more. And I know you look ahead, worried about winning the war rather than the immediate battle. But we still must win battles, eliminate threats and assets of the cult. And if some of us die doing so, that is the risk I at least am willing to take. If I had died fighting Chuth then, but the group had won the battle, I would have considered that worthwhile. I do not fear you getting me killed foolishly. But you need to be willing to risk us more, in my opinion."
He pauses, then says, "We are lucky Chuth remained behind to face us again, and only had destroyed one more village. I feared they would have fled the area completely, and continued their reign of destruction elsewhere. How much longer, how many more lives would they have ruined?"
Out of Character:
Paul, I don't know where you want to take it from here. It is obvious to Velon that the most sensitive member of the Blaze will always cry like a baby if he doesn't get to make all of the plans. He'll also do mental gymnastics to justify that Poljen getting into some melee combat is ALWAYS the best plan and he'll think he can win no matter what the circumstances. What would you like me to do with that?
I've written a couple of posts and deleted them because ultimately Velon just ends up telling Poljen how dumb he is.
Cinder, that is a perfectly valid response. I have said Poljen is not necessarily being rational. He knows he isn't right all the time, but he feels as if he is treated as wrong all the time. Velon has already said he'll listen to Poljen's ideas, leaving unsaid, "No matter how hair-brained they might be." That is enough for the big lug.
At this exact moment though he feels as if Velon is using his views of how Poljen responded during the first fight in the cavern as piling on, accusing him of something he feels he did not do. So if Velon says something along the lines of, "Sorry. I had the order of events mixed up in my memory," Poljen will let that go as well.
Ok well I'm glad to hear you are game for anything out of character. Sometimes in this game since we mix out of character and In-Character stuff and meta game a ton I am not sure how people feel about things in characters vs out and don't want any more drama.
So Velon is not going to say "Sorry. I had the order of events mixed up in my memory". He thinks Poljen will make up just about any logic in his head to justify the plan being a good ol' melee fight starring Poljen and his ego in the lead role every time. The fact that their was an alarm on the mask is not a reason to change the plan. What wizard would not put an alarm spell on their most prized possession? This should not have been a surprise. Why does Poljen think he had drained Neronvain and Chuth of much of their magic by the time Zarra and Mari got to us with the mask? Does he suddenly have deep knowledge of the arcane and know the wizard level of Neronvain and all about how much magic this dragon had? The rest of the time he claims to barely understand magic at all. How many spells had they cast at that point anyhow, 2? 3? Poljen speaks as if he somehow knew that Neronvain had used 14 of his 15 spell slots or something like that. All of this does the opposite of convincing Velon that Poljen is very tactical about these things, instead making him believe that much more strongly that Poljen will always find some way to justify charging into a fight.
That all sounds okay to me. Just don't forget that in the end, he did the right thing and left with the team. In his mind he did so for the team, despite thinking they could win the fight. You can even call him deluded in his reasoning. But he honestly thought the idea was to get in and out without raising an alarm. If you accuse him of going in there planning on changing that plan, he will be quite offended.
Out of Character:
Yeah, that's an important point. There's a big difference between having different opinions on what to do but still being a team player in the end versus just going off and doing whatever one sees fit. We've had that issue with others, but not Poljen. I/Velon don't really recall Poljen's ACTIONS being questionable. He's a bit resistant to anything that isn't "His thing, his way" like grappling or silencing a caster, etc. Versus beating the tar out of things, but in always loyal to the team in the end.
Will work on an in-character post later on.