Latter-Day Saint Jokes - Page 3 of 5

How many Mormons does it take to change a - Page 3 - Jokes, Humor, Forum Games - Posted: 9th Mar, 2004 - 4:35am

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Mormon Jokes
Post Date: 30th Nov, 2003 - 4:10pm / Post ID: #


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Latter-Day Saint Jokes - Page 3

One sunday morning a pastor noticed little alex was stairing up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. It was covered with names and had small american flags mounted on either side of it.
The seven year old had been stareing at the plaque for sometime. So the pastor walked up and stood beside the little boy and said quietly Good morning alex. Good morning pastor replied the young man who was still focused on the plaque.
Pastor what is that? well son its a memorial to all the young mem and women who died in the service.
Soberly they stood together staring at the large plaque. Little alex's voice was barely auditable, and trembling with fear, when he asked, which service the 9;45 or 11'15. :laugh: :laugh:



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Post Date: 8th Jan, 2004 - 10:38pm / Post ID: #


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Jokes Saint Latter-Day

Here is a cute song you can sing when going to Church

Young folk, old folk, everybody come join the mormon sunday school and have alot of fun, please check your chewing gum and razors at the door and you'll hear some bible stories that you never heard befor.
The Lord made Satan ,Satan made sin the Lord made a cubby hole to put Satan in , Satan got mad and said he wouldn"t stay and so hes been acting like the Devil ever since that day.
The earth was made in 6 days and finished on the 7 th, according to the contract it should have been on the 11 th . The workers went on strike and the plumbers wouldn't work so the only thing to do was to fill it up wih dirt.
First he made the ocean, then he made the whale then he made the racoon with a ring around its tail.
Adam was the first man ever invented. he lived all alone and couldn't be contented. They had made him out of mud and had hung him out to dry, now thats the way they had done it in days gone by.
Noah was an old man who lived in the dark. he stumbled over a hammer and built himself an ark. So then in came the animals two by two, the hippo-potomus, and the gerafferarooo too.
Well those are some of the verses to it. I hope you get a smile out of singing them you can even make up your own.



Post Date: 10th Jan, 2004 - 3:38pm / Post ID: #


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Latter-Day Saint Jokes Games Forum & Humor Jokes

QUOTE
So then in came the animals two by two, the hippo-potomus, and the gerafferarooo too.


"gerafferarooo" ?? hoo-kay... lol That's the silliest little ditty I've seen in a long time! What's the tune? Or do we just get to make up the music?

Roz



Post Date: 14th Jan, 2004 - 10:53pm / Post ID: #


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Page 3 Jokes Saint Latter-Day

One day as noah was loading the animals into the ark his son looked down from the bridge and saw his father taking four african gnews into the ark and he asked why four, and noah's reply was well we now have good gnews and bad gnews. so that why bad news usually come in pairs.
O,k which state in the United States is mentioned in the Bible????? when Noah looked out of the ARK-AN-SAW dry land. lol
What was noah"s wife name? Joan of ark.
why is the story of Jona so imspiring ? because he was down in the mouth be he came out alwrite.
do you know when acting was mentioned in the bible.?????? it was Samson he brought the house down.
who was the greatest Dr in the bible????? moses. he delivered the house of Isreal. O,K, more later if you still alright.



Post Date: 1st Feb, 2004 - 2:32am / Post ID: #


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Jokes Saint Latter-Day

O,K, here is one for the bible scholars. who was the greatest Dr in the bible?
Actually there was 2 of them while job had alot of patients, moses delivered the house of Isreal. moses also made house calls because it says that he took 2 tablets to the house of Isreal. (has lightning struck yet). lol lol. :-/



Post Date: 1st Mar, 2004 - 7:06pm / Post ID: #


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Latter-Day Saint Jokes

O,K, for you oscar buffs Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible? Samson he brought the house down.
Well at least he would have gotten Oscar but he escaped. Booooooo.



Post Date: 8th Mar, 2004 - 8:05am / Post ID: #

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Page 3 Latter-Day Saint Jokes

A young Mormon was on his mission, carrying the Book of Mormon in his coat pocket when he was shot by an armed robber. Fortunately, the bullet lodged in the book and saved him. "See," the missionary said to his companion, "that bullet couldn't get through Second Nephi either. :laugh:

Post Date: 9th Mar, 2004 - 4:35am / Post ID: #

AGene
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Latter-Day Saint Jokes - Page 3

How many Mormons does it take to change a light bulb? It depends!

*If it is the Relief Society it takes four.
One to fix refreshments.
One to bring the tablecloth.
One to design the Center Piece,
And one to screw in the light bulb.

*If it is the Bishopric, forget it, they don't do light bulbs.
They call a Priesthood Executive Council and delegate it to the Elders.

*If it is the Elders, it takes four.
Three that don't show up, and One to change the bulb.

*If it is the High Priests it take five.
Two to push the wheel chairs.
One to handle the oxygen tank,
One that falls asleep,
And one to screw in the light bulb.

*If it is the Home Teachers, it only takes two, but you have to
wait until the end of the month.

*If it is the Aaronic Priesthood, it only takes one.
He holds the light bulb in the socket and the whole
world revolves around him. :Attached Image

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