|But what could you do, LDS_F, if he's on his mission? you can't just go get him and take him home, lol...|
My son brought home a baggie from school today that had the initial heading on a piece of pink card stock paper:
"Wanted: Concerned Parents No Experience Necessary"
Below that it has a picture of a baby-cupid and is entitled
THE LOVE PACKET
Instructions: FOR SUCCESSFUL PARENTING
Use the simple parenting tools contained in this bag.
(baggie contains the pertaining items)
TOOTHPICK: To help you "pick out" the good qualities in your child
BUTTON: To remind you that sometimes you need to "button your lip" and listen
CANDY KISS: To remind you of the power of a hug and a kiss
BAND AID: To help heal all of life's hurts-feelings included
ERASER: To erase any mistakes you might make
ROPE: To remind you that if you get to the end of your rope, just tie a knot and "hang on"
I hope this is relevant to successful parenting, since I found these 'fun' ideas to be good reminders for me in parenting my children and the subtitle says "For successful parenting." As for how to measure successful parenting, I think that the overall 'health' of my child, that is the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well being of my child, is the best indicator of successful parenting. I would only entrust the determination and opinion of that health to be made by professionals and doctors, not the opinions of others who may be unqualified to make any correct assessment or judgement about them.
**Shrugs** I don't know much about other religions than my own (and I'm the minority in this thread) lol... But...
I think good parenting is being able to raise and send off intelligent, successful, and compassionate young adults into the world. I have grown up with all types of people around me - people from all backgrounds and family types - single parent households and married couples that have stuck together for 30+ years (miserably or happily) and sometimes diamonds appear out of the rough if you know what I mean. Regardless of what religion you follow, it all comes down to being kind to one another. Help someone out of kindness, not just for something you get in return out of it.... and I think that if more people would just live by this rule, the world would be a nicer place.
If you teach correct priciples, love then no matter what they do, they will become succsessful and you will have done your job as a parent. However it all depends on how you define what a good parent is.
This is a really tough question. I wanted to say being able to provide for your children, but I realize there are a lot of good parents out there who may not be able to provide everything for their children, but that doesn't make them a failure. Then there are those parents who provide everything and then some, and their kids despise them, abuse them and take them for granted. Are they successes?
For me, I want to be able to give my child first and foremost, the basics, ie food, shelter, clothing, etc. Secondly, I want my children to know that I love them, that I care about them, and that regardless of what I do or say, I have good intentions for them. Lastly, I want to be able to provide a home for them. So many times you hear about young adults and their experiences at 'home'. I grew up in a 'broken' home so to speak, because I had no father, my mother had me because of guilt, and I really did not belong. I don't know how else to explain it. I had aunts and uncles and cousins who cared for me, but it was more about providing the basics, but not much more. I want my kids to be feel like they belong to something; that home is a safe haven for them, not just a place to sleep, eat and watch TV. I am rambling now, and maybe not making much sense, but above all else, I believe in the family unit. If I can create a sense of family and belonging with my kids, regardless of how old they are, then I would feel like I have been a successful parent.
I actually had a good answer to this until I read through the entire thread. So much to think about when judging a successful parent. I give my kids everything they need, Food, clothing, shelter, love. I give them somethings they want, toys, books, pets. I give them whats intangible, support encouragment, my time. My kids love me and I love them, does that not make me a successful parent? What if my kids end up bad no matter what I do, am I still successful? I don't know, but I think if a parent truly gives everything he has to a child, then he has done his job as a parent. At some point, the blame or congrats of a childs life have to go to the child and not the parent. Exactly where that point is, I don't know.
|I actually had a good answer to this until I read through the entire thread.|
I think that you have achieved your goal if your child feels love and security, but has also felt that they have been provided for throughout their life. I feel that it is important that they can feel that they can trust you enough to come to you regarding any problem, and they will be heard confidentially, and never pushed away.
As long as my children try their best, I don't think you can ask any more of them.