How do you measure Successful Parenthood? - Page 2 of 7

LDS_Forever said QUOTE Oh my....I don't think - Page 2 - Parenting, Teens, Home Improvement - Posted: 1st Nov, 2003 - 7:24pm

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Every good parent's question?
Post Date: 30th Oct, 2003 - 8:07pm / Post ID: #


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How do you measure Successful Parenthood? - Page 2

I guess a clear conscious is good. Maybe there can some self-evaluation questions we can ask (Top of my head):

1. Have I measured up to some of the things mentioned as basic to children?

2. Does my child love me? How do I know?

3. Does my child know I love her? How do I know?

4. Do I feel happy to talk about my children, do I always look for and think about the best for them?

5. Does my child know that no matter what, I am here for her?



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Post Date: 30th Oct, 2003 - 11:48pm / Post ID: #


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Parenthood Successful measure you How

Those are some good questions, JB.  And once we've answered all those to our own satisfaction, can we say...

I've done the best I could.  I've taught that child, I love that child, and I know she loves me.  And now I have to understand Agency, and that my child must choose for herself.  And then relate that to my relationship with Heavenly Father, and my child's relationship to Him.

That's the hard part.  Letting go, but staying close by -- in spirit if not in reality.

You've really made me think, JB.  Thanks.

Roz



Post Date: 31st Oct, 2003 - 9:13am / Post ID: #


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How do you measure Successful Parenthood? Improvement Home & Teens Parenting

QUOTE
That's the hard part.  Letting go, but staying close by -- in spirit if not in reality.

Letting go seems to be the hardest amongst parents, especially mothers. I did read a talk once that says a parent is always a parent, but a parent is not the ruler of the child. Once marriage is in play - let go.



Post Date: 31st Oct, 2003 - 2:27pm / Post ID: #


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Page 2 Parenthood Successful measure you How

QUOTE
Once marriage is in play - let go.


What do you exactly mean? because if my son/daughter is being mistreated in their marriage for instance, you bet I'll do something about that!!!!!



Post Date: 1st Nov, 2003 - 9:18am / Post ID: #


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Parenthood Successful measure you How

Well, not completely cutting off all contact!  Just letting go of control of the child.  Especially in adulthood and marriage.  My sister had a hard time letting go while her (firstborn) son was on a mission many years ago -- there was flooding where he was, bad flooding, and later he broke his ankle doing something.  But he was on a *mission* -- she couldn't just go get him and bring him home.  After he came home, he left the church and was married in a civil ceremony.  She said it was the hardest thing to let him do those things, when she wanted to go take him by the ear and *make him behave*!  But he's an adult now.  So she has to respect his desire to make his own decisions for his life -- his Agency -- while maintaining a close relationship.  Even when he asks for advice and then doesn't follow it! It's interesting for me to watch  their situation and wonder how I'll react with my own son :)

Roz



Post Date: 1st Nov, 2003 - 10:59am / Post ID: #


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How do you measure Successful Parenthood?

Oh, oh, looks like the attack of the ladies ;) No I am not saying cut all relations, I am saying to give the child the freedom to make his/her decisions as a parent/spouce.  Too many times you see a parent telling a child (now married) what to do rather than counseling.



Post Date: 1st Nov, 2003 - 2:07pm / Post ID: #


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Page 2 How you measure Successful Parenthood

QUOTE
My sister had a hard time letting go while her (firstborn) son was on a mission many years ago -- there was flooding where he was, bad flooding, and later he broke his ankle doing something.  But he was on a *mission* -- she couldn't just go get him and bring him home.  After he came home, he left the church and was married in a civil ceremony.  She said it was the hardest thing to let him do those things, when she wanted to go take him by the ear and *make him behave*!  But he's an adult now.  So she has to respect his desire to make his own decisions for his life -- his Agency -- while maintaining a close relationship.


Oh my....I don't think I will be able to handle something like that :(. I will feel so tempted to say something and even get all upset about it! ohh gosh, I hope Felipe can be small forever...;D



Post Date: 1st Nov, 2003 - 7:24pm / Post ID: #


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How you measure Successful Parenthood - Page 2

LDS_Forever said

QUOTE
Oh my....I don't think I will be able to handle something like that . I will feel so tempted to say something and even get all upset about it! ohh gosh, I hope Felipe can be small forever...


Just wait until you have a *little girl*!  Things are very very different.  What I mean is, I'm so much more protective of her than I was for my son.  And she's a different kind of child.

But what could you do, LDS_F, if he's on his mission????  you can't just go get him and take him home, lol...


Roz



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